Self Harm

Self harm

This week was a tough week for me; I was witness to a young man who felt that the only way to ease his pain was to harm himself. Luckily we were able to talk with him, and keep him safe until the paramedics arrived to tend to his wounds. When arriving at the hospital the young man was disappointed that he was still here. Broke my heart to hear that. Not even yet an adult and with so much to live for but yet felt like he did not have any other choice. The young man has had multiple attempts in the past due to his substance use and mental illness. I just hope one of these times he doesn’t succeed.

I visited the young man the next morning; he was happy to see me and thanked us for the quick action and for staying with him during the whole ordeal. I asked him why he thanked me as I explained that that is what people that care do, stick beside someone regardless of the situation. The young man says he has never had that before and was shocked. The young man explained to me why he did it. He stated “my grandfather would not bring me Marijuana or Meth and I just wanted to go to a happy place for 30 minutes or so”. After talking with him I have learned that this had been normal routine with the drugs and alcohol since the boy was 11 and when he was denied the substance it threw him into a state of panic. It’s sad to think that a family member, who is supposed to be a role model and a mentor, was role modeling the dangerous and obviously harmful behavior. The young man will have another reminder of his situation and the pain that he feels on a daily basis, 40 surgical staples on each arm extending from the base of his wrist to the bend in the elbow.

The young man broke down when we talked and says to me, “why can’t I just feel like I belong, why can’t I just be loved like other people my age” My response, “you are loved and cared about that’s why I am here and as for belonging, you are not in heaven so you must still belong here with us” he laughed and thanked me once again.

If you ever notice someone who is doing things to themselves that could be considered self-harm, let them know that you care and that you are glad they are a part of your daily lives. Most people just want to belong and feel wanted.  

Self-harm can manifest in so many ways, here is just a few

 - Cutting

- Single / repeated overdoses

- Disfiguration of the body

- Swallowing sharp objects or foreign objects

- Inserting foreign objects into the body

- Swallowing poisonous substances

- Hair-pulling

- Head banging

- Scratching

- Excessive scrubbing of skin e.g. with sandpaper, scourers, Chinese rubs etc.

- Burning with cigarettes

- Alcohol/drug abuse

- Eating disorders

- Repeated attempted suicide

Please be a friend to someone who may need it. There is so much negativity, and for my young friend let’s make this world his happy place so that he does not have to harm himself again to try and find it.

Santa